I searched every corner of the shop but couldn’t find the bag. My mother saw the tension and stress written all over my face. She questioned severally if all was okay. I lied to her just to stop her from asking because it was kind of irritating me. I tried to relax a while and then continued my search. You should have seen the smile on my face when I found it. It was a relief. I combed through the bag and there it was. I found the uber driver’s contact.

I left the shop and went back home. My mother didn’t really know I had lost my v-card and I wasn’t ready to tell her. At home, I phoned the uber driver. He picked up and told me he was driving and that he’d call back once he found a place to pack.

Thirty minutes was like forever. Waiting is something I don’t like at all. I am very impatient and trust me, I have tried enough to change but no, I am still me. He called back in thirty minutes and when I asked him, he told me he didn’t remember me very well. He mentioned about eight names of girls like me who allowed him in just for a ride. He told me he was happy I had called because the sex we had helped him. He explained how his girlfriend confessed that she deliberately kept holes in all the condoms so that she could get pregnant for him. This confession swept him off his feet as he thought he had impregnated me. After he didn’t get my call for so many weeks, he decided to visit the hospital. The doctor tested for almost all infections related to sexual health and found out that he was infertile. He wouldn’t be able to have children of his own. It was hurtful but a relief. He didn’t have any sexually transmitted infection too. His girlfriend broke up with him when he told her about the results from the doctor.

I was finished. How was I going to find money to control this thing? My last option was to tell my mother or my father. Since I was closer to my mother, I decided to tell her when she got back home. I didn’t want to break her heart at her work place. That would’ve been embarrassing. I lay on the couch and rehearsed the words I’d use to explain everything to my mother. I don’t even know the time I slept off.

My mother woke me up when she came. It was quite earlier than usual. She asked again if everything was okay with me. I had to let it out. I made her sit, then I gave her a glass of water. The drama was too much.

“ Mom, I have had sex, I am no longer a virgin”. She smiled and said she knew. I was surprised. Why didn’t scold me? She explained that she found out I was no longer a virgin after I completed senior high school and came home. She believed I had had sex about four times after that. Herhh!, fear mothers. You have to fear boys but fear mothers too. I wasn’t expecting that. She advised me to be careful. Then she asked if that was all. I then mentioned the HIV Aids.

Her face changed, but she looked sad than angry. She took a sip of the water had provided. She was very quiet for a while then she said,

“ Eighteen years ago when I gave birth to you, the doctor told me I was having HIV Aids. I was very surprised to hear that because when your father and I got married, I was still a virgin and all through our marriage, I didn’t have any other sex partner except your father. I searched for answers as to how I got it but to no avail. I was getting crazy over it. one evening, your father came home and was looking very down and stressed. I decided to find out what was wrong. He went of his knees and explained that I wasn’t the only woman he went to bed with and that he had the virus. That’s why we are no longer together. That day at the hospital, the doctor said it had been transferred to you. I’m sorry. The pills you have been taking are not for your skin as I have led you to believe, they are just to help control the virus.”

We both broke into tears. I was more than hurt and angry, not at my mother but at my father. That was the last time my father ever saw me.